David Perell

David Perell quotes on relationships

"The Writing Guy". He tweet about business, online learning, and Internet writing.

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You’ll never forget the people who believed in you before anybody else did


I’ve basically stopped hanging out with people in big groups. 2-4 people only. The conversations are so much deeper and the friendships are so much stronger. Strong recommend.


The online course arbitrage. People will pay $10-20 for a book, but those same people will pay $1,000-2,000 for the same information in a live video format. The lesson: People want more than information. They also want inspiration, accountability and friends to learn with.


Book clubs are a cheat code. Every time I do one, I remember the book 5x better. It takes 20 hours to read a book, but only 2 extra hours to talk about it with friends. Better friendships. Faster learning.


Goal for your 20s: Find your “10 Club” Your 10 Club is a group of 10 people you want to work with later in life. They should be kind, ambitious, and generous. Travel together, meet their families, and attend their weddings.


Key goal of your 20s: Build relationships with people you want to work with later in life. The seeds of great companies are sown years before they’re built.


Small talk builds relationships because it says “I care more about you than being productive”


If you want to build deep friendships, you need extended time with people. Unfortunately, western culture makes this hard. Here’s my heuristic: Aim for at least three hours of conversation whenever you’re with a friend. Anything shorter leaves no room for the soul.


Secret to good relationships: Both people are okay losing most arguments.


Partner with people who still have a lot of childhood friends because they’re the most loyal.


I've learned a lot from Peter Thiel. In particular, I admire his ability to bet on people. He surrounds himself with driven people with bold beliefs about the world. Then, he empowers them with money, attention, and encouragement. The ultimate node in a network of ambition.


Whenever you find yourself thinking that people are rational, remember that people spend more on lottery tickets than movies, video games, music, sporting events, and books combined


My 5 Rules for Networking: 1. Smile 2. Laugh 3. Built friendships, not contacts. 4. Help the other person before you ask them to help you. 5. When in doubt, stay home. Most networking is a waste of time. Read, write and share your ideas online instead.


Assume you don’t have free will. You are 100% programmed by your environment. If it’s true, you are what you consume. You become what you read. You act just like your friends. Might be a useful idea, even if it isn’t 100% true. Better inputs. Better outputs.


Good hobbies make you smarter, wealthier, or improve your relationships. Writing online does all three.


My career is driven by one insight. Writing on the internet give you massive leverage. Here’s why: Demand for quality content far exceeds the supply of it. Sharing ideas attracts kind and intelligent people. Some will become business partners. And others, lifelong friends.


To find interesting ideas, look for people at the intersection of two fields which rarely overlap


One simple change has made a HUGE difference in my life. Old: I used to hang with people for 60 minutes at a time. New: Now I spend 3-6 hours with friends at a time. The laughs are louder, the relationships are stronger, and the conversations are deeper. Strong recommend.


My favorite people are intellectually surprising. They‘re fun to talk to because they package ideas in ways I’ve never seen before. When you find a friend you respect, but often disagree with, keep them close. You’ll learn the most from them.


A word to young professionals: Always, always, always follow-up with people. Most people aren't ignoring you. They're just busy.


Marketers are applied psychologists. The best ones don't sell products. They sell people on their future selves.


By the end of this decade, it will be normal to be “best friends” with someone you’ve never met before.


Writing online is networking for introverts. Instead of chasing the best people, you can have the best people come to you. Skip the conferences. Publish your best ideas instead.


Give knowledge work the same respect that great athletes give their sport. Train every day, write detailed improvement plans, and surround yourself with people who push you towards excellence.


The good conversations begin after you’ve spent 2 hours with somebody and everything before is mostly show


When you first enter the business world, you look up to people older you and think they’re your ticket to success. Then you realize your peer group is the key.


Less of this: “Find your passion.” More of this: “Work hard, surround yourself with incredible people, and serve others to make your work meaningful.”


Every time you share an idea on the Internet, robots carry them around the globe until they find your future friends — and they basically work for free


Secret to hospitality: small gifts. • If you run a Airbnb, leave chocolate on the bed. • If you run a fashion store, give away drinks. Free bonuses assume a long-term relationship. Naturally, people reciprocate with good vibes and good reviews.


If you’re good at getting things done, one of the best career decisions you can make is to team up with an fast growing content creator and run their business operations. Creators want to spend their time creating.


Why I write long-form essays: 1) Writing sharpens my thinking. 2) To attract the most intellectually curious people in the world — and learn from them. 3) To build deep relationships with readers, some of whom will become lifelong friends. Long-form is my favorite format.


The easiest way to be interesting is to surprise people, and the easiest way to surprise people is to surprise yourself


Ambitious people need two things: 1. More direct feedback. 2. Encouragement to raise their aspirations. People with fast feedback loops and a supportive set of peers are unstoppable.


Tweets build relationships. Tweetstorms build followers. Email subscribers build businesses.


The online creator playbook. ∙ Grow your audience on social media. ∙ Deepen the relationship via email. ∙ Build trust with a podcast. ∙ Monetize the masses with a subscription. ∙ Sell a course to your most engaged fans. ∙ Coaching and consulting for your best fans.


Nothing makes me feel alive like working with exceptional people


Ways to think about writing online: 1) Writing: How you discover what you’re thinking in the first place. 2) Writing: How to use the Internet to make friends. 3) Writing: Making your ideas work for you 24/7, as they spread across every corner of the globe.


On the Internet, people want to follow people — not brands.


What I've learned about online education: 1) People don't just want information. They want inspiration, friendship, and accountability. 2) Self-paced courses don't usually work because transformative learning can only happen with a group of peers.


Share an optimistic vision on the Internet, update people on your progress, and thousands of people will help you achieve it


Online courses: Come for the course, stay for the community. Instructors should focus on: • Live 1-on-1 chats for students to meet people • Tools for students to message each other • Ways for students to help each other • Systems to match students with shared interests


Invest in your friendships. As the world changes faster and faster, you need friends to help you navigate the future. The future is hard to predict. And friends who help each other have a huge advantage. You and your friends are like CARTOGRAPHERS — mapping out the future.


My #1 Learning Strategy: FOMO your way towards brilliance. Step 1: Surround yourself with intellectually hungry people. Step 2: Hang out with them. They'll inspire you and give you "Information FOMO." Step 3: Learn on your own. Go back to step 1. Repeat cycle forever.


Email and meetings are the entropy of work. The more people you meet, the more they take over — and eventually, they want to occupy 100% of your productive time. But if you want to make things, you need free time. Make space for creative work.


Never been a big fan of birthday presents but surprising people with random gifts at random times is my favorite thing ever.


Best way to become a better writer: Live an interesting life. Talk to people who make you think. Travel to places that spring you to life. Live the kind of life you’ll want to tell your grandchildren about.


The best books are: 1) Highly recommended by your close circle of trusted friends. 2) Are basically invisible in the world at large. You won't find them on best-seller lists or on the front table at Barnes & Noble. Use this formula to discover hidden gems.


Spending an extended amount of time with someone — in an unfamiliar setting — is forever under-rated. Best way to build relationships.


Lessons from creating an online course: 1) Making a course is hard. But marketing is the ultimate differentiator. 2) People come for the results, but stay for the people. 3) Over time, the ideas in your course will become a commodity. Community is the long-term differentiator.


2010s: The decade of online dating. 2020s: The decade of online friendship.

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